Prayerful Friends

I actually started a post yesterday about prayer. I stopped in the middle when I got stumped and was messaging a friend of mine. Our conversation made me delete what I wrote.

My friend’s husband has been having some health issues lately. Since the start all she has asked for is prayers. Prayers is what she has gotten. It was looking like her husband was looking at major setbacks in his recovery. She asked for even more prayers. Which they got! Talking with her at the beginning of the day it was about bad health. Last night, she told me that one of the major hurdles was turning around! Prayers of thanks went up. She had thanked me earlier for praying for them. I found that to be silly to thank me for. We are good friends. Friends pray for and with each other. Truly prayerful friends that is.

I can tell you that I have surrounded myself with True Prayerful Friends. I know that if I am having a bad day with grief, I can reach out to my friends Tonya or Mrs. Laurie and prayers are said immediately. When I just need prayers of comfort and guidance, Melanie is the first one I reach out to. If I need prayers to help me watch my tongue, Misty is the one I call. When I just need a flooding of prayer, I send a mass text to the Ladies of my church. I know my new friend Sheryl is about one of the most faithful praying friends I have. When I am needing deep prayers and questioning my faith, I make a call to my pastor and his wife. I have others that I know really pray. I can feel prayers being said right when they are requested. I also know that these people along with a few others, are really gonna get to the business of praying.

I have changed from the praying person I was 18 months ago to the one I am now. Most of the time when people asked for prayer, I would wait until bedtime or when I remembered it. Now I pray immediately. I have failed so many people by using the phrase, “I will pray for you.” I would say it and then just go about my business and my life. It took seeing some of the small blessings in my life that came only after prayer from myself and others to see the real power in it. Real prayers. Sincere prayers. Now when I say I will pray for someone,it goes in a prayer book and it gets prayed on multiple times a day!

Are you a True Prayerful Friend? Or are you someone that feels comfort in just saying you will pray?



If Jesus had a FaceBook…..

Scrolling through FaceBook this morning, I just had to shake my head a little. Some people had one post praising Jesus and in the next talking about “Turning up this weekend”. After scrolling a little more, I see a post that says I have to share this picture of Jesus to be blessed. Then another where I will be denying Jesus if I do not share. It just got me to thinking what would happen if I didn’t share and tag 10 of my friends? Am I going to all of sudden have worse luck than I already do? I didn’t share the other one, so I guess I must not be blessed anymore. Funny, I haven’t found that part in the Bible yet. Gonna have to make a point to ask Charles about that in Bible Study Wednesday.

The people who in their posts of partying Jesus on Friday and Saturday and then praising the Lord on Sunday made me just want to pray for them. Looking back on my TimeHop, I can see where I had times like those. Almost as if you are in a battle of self. You want to good so that you get that foot into heaven. Yet, you want to drink and dance it up with the band on weekends. Maybe it is just older age, stronger faith or more knowledge in the Word that makes me question this.

After scrolling more, I realize it wasn’t just that young girl. There were older people posting that they needed prayers for the headache they had from the night of partying before. But this all just gets me to one question? If Jesus had a FaceBook would you send him a friend request? Would you accept a friend request from him? Would you think that by sharing a picture of him that you are golden in his eyes? Would you be ashamed of that picture you posted with the foul language and funny saying about what Monday can do with itself? What about that pic with the hand gesture? Or maybe that one pic where you are posing for a selfie in your underwear?

I know I am not perfect but I try my best everyday to do the right things, study my bible, pray and thank him. Gonna ask though if I have lost my spot in heaven for not sharing a picture. And by the way, the only bad thing that has happened to me today since not sharing a picture with ten of my friends was a stumped toe when running to answer the phone. Was it bad luck for not reposting or just a poorly placed chair? I am not sure what it was but sharing what I learned in church Sunday with the person on the other end of the call made it better!

P.S. I will not be sharing the pictures of Jesus for luck, but I will talk to you about him anytime for your salvation!

Friend Request - Jesus

Love without color

DISCLAIMER: I am not a professional writer. I am just a housewife with thoughts in my jumbled overworked brain. I may not have used politically correct terms. I may have unknowingly offended someone and I am sorry in advance. This is my story in the words that I was raised hearing. Please read to the end before you tell me how horrible I am. You will see it all comes to a point.

My niece has made me take a look at myself over the past few months. My niece has made me see how I was wrong about things in the past. My niece and her big heart that sees no colors or differences in people has made me a better person.
Growing up in a small southern town, from a big southern family with a long line of southern traditions, there were things that just were not done. And whether you understood the reason or not, you just abided by those “unspoken laws”. You just simply did not date someone that was not of your color. Now before you go thinking that my family is some back woods thinking people, let me continue. Whether spoken or not, it just never came up really. In my Mom’s generation segregation had just happened. In my generation, I went to school with the children of the first black children that ever attended school with my white Mom. There was never a question of race that I can recall in my generation. There were whispers of my cousin that dated a black boy behind the family’s back but it was never spoken aloud. Then the whispers of one of my close friends getting pregnant by none other than a black boy. This was the first time I had ever really seen it up close and out loud. Yes, I was sheltered or had blinders on. After that friend, I saw how some of my friends had been dating the opposite “race” for quite a while now. Then came when it hit our immediate family circle, I was forced to see it head on. My younger sis moved in with a boy that was half white, half black and 100% wonderful. He fished with my boys and all of us loved him. I saw the way family treated her and it broke my heart. Not just because she was my sis but because they didn’t see how great he was especially with my kids. That relationship fizzled and a side note, she married one of the worst “white” boys known to man. { Color doesn’t make you a good person.}
Moving on…….. The biggest news of all to hit this huge southern family happened! One of my cousin’s was going to have a baby by a black man! Can you imagine!? What was this family to do??? What were people going to say? The older generation went into fits! The middle generation was just watching everyone else act a fool. The younger generation, could have cared less. This was going to be our first child of “mixed color” or “mixed seed”. The mixed seed reference from one relative made me laugh. I think regardless of color, we are all of “mixed seed”. That just always seemed so stupid to me. Anyway, the day came when this baby arrived and I fell in love with him. In fact we all did. Well most anyway. {P.s. The father wasn’t the best mate choice for my cousin. Proving of color doesn’t make a good person.} Times had changed. We all just looked at this boy and wondered how anyone could hate him because of his color. Change was happening in this bunch. This went on to another cousin dating a black man. Who by the way, we all love! They are broke up but we are still in contact with him. He watches my daughter and son like a hawk and keeps them out of trouble. I think we were more heartbroken when they broke up than they were.

So now we move on to what has inspired this blog. My niece text me  a few months ago and was upset. She started it with the phrase I hate most, “I need to talk to you and it needs to be a secret.” I thought if this girl tells me she is pregnant I am going to tell her mom and we will both beat the brakes off her. But it wasn’t. She wanted me to know that she was dating a “Black” boy. My first thought was instant relief for no baby on the way and then the thought of why is this a secret. She went on to tell me that some other relatives and such were in major disagreement over this. This was just not done they said! How could she do this to the family? My response was simply, “Does he make you happy? Does he treat you like the princess you are?” She says yes and yes! When Jeff got home, that night I told him I had something to tell him about his niece. He looked at me and said,”She better not be pregnant!” I said, “No, she is dating a black boy.” He says, “Is that all? I would have been more shocked if you told me he was white!” He said he has always “known” her preference. I didn’t get him to elaborate. This man has an uncanny sense of knowing these girls better than I ever will and of what they like!

We had planned a party here on New Year’s Day and she sent me this text, “We are coming Thursday and I wanted to know if D could come? If you say no I understand.” My response, “Why couldn’t he come? Is he not housebroken?” She says yes he is and I say then as long as he doesn’t poop on my floors he can come.  Now to why I am writing this long blog, what made her ask me this!? Why does she feel like she has to ask permission for him to come over the threshold of the Schell residence? I asked her this. She said that other family would not let D come to their house. This troubled me. Are these family members willing to risk being around this lovely niece of ours just because of color hatred? Even worse, How can these people claim to love Jesus and then hate a young man because of the color of his skin before ever meeting him? Well, she brought him to our house. He is a wonderful, polite young man. He adores my niece. He treats her like a princess. She is a handful and a half and he just smiles at all her crazy ways. And in the words of her Mom, “Until he hurts her, I support them.”

This has prompted me to look in the Bible and see where it says that I should hate him because of his color. First, I believe it says,in John 3:16 that “God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that WHOSOEVER believeth  in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” Not that all you “white” people can go to heaven. All people.  The verse that makes skin color fade for me is Galatians 3:38 “There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither bond nor free, there is neither male nor female: for ye are all one in Christ Jesus.” Right there,doesn’t say anything about if you :are white, black, yellow, purple or polka dotted. John  7:24 sealed it, “Judge not according to the appearance, but judge righteous judgement.” Jesus said that out of his very mouth.  So there it is: Jesus said not to judge appearance. (skin color, hair color etc)

But most of all Jesus says LOVE. We are to love everyone. It says so in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8. (Get a Bible and read it yourself) We should all love. If you say you love Jesus, then you should love everyone.  It is hard for me sometimes to overlook the way we were “taught” in my younger days and just love. This proving that we are taught a lot of our hate and misunderstandings. Sometimes I feel a pain of “what will the family say” when one of these many kids does something “against family tradition”. But I will say, 99% of the time, I just welcome it and love. There are good and bad of every race. We just have to surround ourselves with all the good and surround each other with love. The other 1% that I slip, I pray that God forgives me.

So my dear niece, I hope that you and D have a wonderful long life together! I want to attend both high school graduations in a few months. In the upcoming years, their college graduations. I want to dance at their wedding, spoil their children, have family dinners together. I just simply want to LOVE.

The happy couple! May they have many many years of smiles and love!

The happy couple! May they have many many years of smiles and love!

Mary did you know?

We have all heard the song, Mary did you know. I have personally heard in hundreds of times. I was up most of the early morning with this song running through my head. I have been trying to relate or fathom the story of Jesus these past few weeks. I have often thought since my own son died, if I could be like God and sacrifice my son knowingly for the good of mankind. Think about? Could you see your son nailed to a cross?
I have often thought, why does God give some mothers the joy of a child and then take it away? He certainly knows the pain of losing a child. And yes, I know that we are not to question God. But when you lose a child, you question everything. And I mean everything.
Mary did you know talks about the miracles of Jesus and his great works. Very lovely song. This morning I cried for her. Did she know also that her son would be sacrificed? The pain she must have felt. The pain God must have felt. He knew that his son was going to die. I think sometimes how I would have felt these last 20 years if I had known that this son of mine was going to die on December 30,2013. Would I have even wanted to have those 20 years knowing I would now have a lifetime of pain left? Of course the answer is yes. But of course, I was not given a “date stamp” on my child like God was.
I guess what I am trying to say this morning is just think about it. “For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” (John 3:16) He loved us that much that he gave his son. In no way whatsoever could I say that I would give one of my children for any one on this earth. I still have issues giving my son back to God! This morning I woke up just astounded by this. I have heard it over and over all my life. Gave his only begotten son. Gave his son for you and I. Unfathomable! But he did. And I have everlasting life. My son is in heaven with everlasting life!
I challenge each and every one of you to not just say that verse, but think on it. Let it roll around in your mind. God did something that not one of us, no matter how radically obedient, would do. Or at least for sure not something I would do. He gave his child, HIS CHILD!
This morning I wept tears of gratefulness and prayed many thanks to God for giving us this gift. This morning was the first time that I felt the pain he must have felt. This morning I just wept for Jesus.
Interesting how a song can get your mind working in a way that it never has before!
mary did you know

Giving To Heal The Hurt

Giving. Do you know what it means to you? Everyone translates that one word to mean what suits them best. Whether it be a selfish translation or one of utter selfishness. My translation may be one to surprise you all.

Giving to me is all about my survival right now. Yes, survival. I have always been one to help others or jump when needed. But now, I give even when I am not needed. I give when it is not going to be known to anyone but to me. I give to keep from crashing into the rigged rocks on the shore of grief.

There have times when I get so withdrawn into my grief and sorrow over losing Richie that I would go to dark places in my head. I would just shut down from all family and friends. Then one day, when I was at a low point, I really thought about the feelings. If I was feeling this then certainly some other Mom in grief was too. So I sat down and wrote a note of love to a Mom that I knew was grieving. This one note started a pattern. Now if I am sad, I send a note, email or text of cheer to someone. If I am lonely, I send a random text to a friend wishing them a great day. If I feel ugly, I send a text telling someone else they are beautiful. I will bake someone their favorite cake and take it to them if I simply need to keep myself busy.If I need a laugh, I just snap chat one of my nieces a picture being silly.

You see, this whole life we have been given is not about us as an individual. It is about each other. It is about what we put out n the universe. In Luke 6:38 Jesus says, “Give and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over, shall men give to your bosom. For with the same measure that ye mete withal it shall be measured to you again.” To me, this means that whatever I give out to the world, will surely be given back to me. What does this mean I will be given? Well, it can be something as simple as a smile I was needing when I drop that note in the mailbox. Or it could be the thought of knowing someone later in the day will enjoy a slice of that cake. Maybe I will receive nothing but the fact of knowing I did it. No matter what the reason I did it for or the return I get from it, I know I am being measured by God. He sees the things I do and he is building my rewards that are going to be greater than anything I can get here on Earth. I also like to think that the giving young man that went to heaven is watching what is being done here. I do not think he wants me crying in self-pity but rather wants me doing like he did for us.

So for me, giving is healing. And in healing, I am doing what is expected of me as a child of God. In all the crazy messed up ways the world is now, maybe it would be better if we all tried to heal the world by small acts of giving. Just think if we healed the whole world!!!!